A Coward Among Us

This current topic couldn’t have come at a better time. I’ve been trying to brainstorm different blog ideas for a while now. I wanted to keep my streak going but was having a hard time...

And than it happened. Forgive me. YOU happened!

I’ve fallen victim to the actions of someone without a soul. Someone so cruel and unjust it's hard to even fathom how I allowed myself to be associated with them in the first place. 

I’m taking my feelings to the blog world and now my readers from Portland to New York, Denmark to Vietnam, and Florida to Hong Kong will all see you for who you are...

A coward.

I can see you now. Mouse in hand. Clicking away like life is one giant computer screen. Emotionless. Devoid of any true feelings or sensitivity. Well let me tell you something, whoever it is you are, life isn’t played on a computer screen. It’s played with souls. It’s played with dreams. It’s played with laughter and love. And most importantly, it’s played with friends.

You Un-Friended me on Facebook.

And now I know where we stand. Now I know.

"Going Barista"

I’ve made up my mind...

I’ve come to the conclusion that the #1 Ranked Most Difficult Job In The World belongs to the baristas at Starbucks who work the Coffee Making Station.

It’s really a no brainer and I’m surprised it took me this long to figure out.

Not a Starbucks-Visit goes by without me in absolute awe of the man or woman manning that particular station. It just seems so entirely difficult and stressful that I’m willing to bet that you would find Starbucks Baristas on the Top 10 List of Jobs That Make You Want to Kill Yourself.

Think about how difficult their job really is the next time you order your Iced Grande Soy Latte Con Leche Moca Frappucino Vente Spectacular With an Extra Shot Drizzled in Caramel.

In an ironic twist The #1 Ranked Easiest Job In The World belongs to the Starbucks Cashier who doesn’t even have to give you a receipt. Just swipe the card and yell out the order. Let the Coffee Maker take care of the hard part! And take care of the hard part they do!

They’ll turn that gigantically confusing drink order into the following code: IG1C. Somehow they know exactly what it means while 47 more orders are being tossed their way. In the meantime, they have a dozen snobby coffee drinkers demanding their IG1C’s ASAP.

I’m honestly fascinated by their ability to multitask with such efficiency. You heard it hear first – within the next few years the term “Going Postal” is going to become “Going Barista”. It’s only a matter of time 'til one of them goes nuts. Only a matter of time.

And I couldn’t blame them.

Life Is So Great! Please...

Facebook kick, anyone? This will be back-to-back posts regarding Zuckerberg’s finest. I’m finding it increasingly easy to blog about the world that is Facebook. In this installment I will pose a simple, yet deep, question:

Are you honestly that happy with your life or is the idea of your glorious status update merely a smokescreen?

I’m sure it’s a little bit of both. I’m sure we all wake up some days and simply love life. We love our kids (should we have any), we love our family, we love our friends, we love whatever god you should choose to love, we are just full of love and happiness. We're all just budding with love in the flower bed of life! (You have to give me serious credit for that one. Even I impress myself sometimes.)

My question is more about the frequency of this love.

I get the feeling that if you told this guy what you tell the Facebook world he'd look right through you and say, “Is that really how you feel?” Cue the emotional breakdown of guilt.

Again, don’t get me wrong, I’m sure you’re all quite happy one way or another. We all have our reasons to be happy. Some seem to be taken to an extreme though. Maybe if in between updates on how excited you are to start your day you threw in a few negatives we could take your positives a little more seriously. Here’s an example of a succession of posts that might be good…

Post 1
“Looking forward to a day with the family and my lovely kids. Been a busy week for sure.”

Post 2

“Ok fine, lovely kids, is a loose term since they just ransacked my living room and spilled cranberry juice on the white carpet…damn Terrible Twos.”

Post 3

“…and now my husband wont turn the Xbox off. Unbelievable.”

Post 4“

Finally got the kids on track and husband in line and can finally relax!”

I think that’s more realistic then what is usually posted. It’s more believable than, say, something typical like this…

Post 1
“Cant wait to spend the whole day with my lovely kids and amazing husband. I'm so lucky to have such a wonderful family! Life doesn’t get much better! ”

Post 2
“My kids are so cute! Evidently they think cranberry juice goes well on white carpet. They’re so precious I could just die! Scrapbook moment for sure!”

Post 3
“…all this while my husband is oblivious since I bought him his Xbox. He deserves it since he works so hard!”

Post 4
“From start to finish today was amazing. Memories that last a lifetime. I am the luckiest person in the world!”

I just get the impression that the first series of posts is what everyone is truly thinking but doesn’t want to say. It’s not everyone either. I applaud those of you that actually say something negative about your life. And if you are being honest with life being so amazing you should still throw in some negatives to make it more believable. I mean heck, how great could your life really be if it’s always so damn great?

Everyone needs a little winter to truly to appreciate the summer.